Wondering how to get a sexy girlfriend in GTA: San Andreas? Here’s our comprehensive guide on helping you to find digital love in a loveless game world.
So you’ve dived into Rockstar Games’ masterpiece GTA: San Andreas and now your life is complete with playing out scenes of gang warfare, driving monster trucks around in the countryside, and occasionally dipping into area 51 to steal some stuff. But all that action and adventure is worth little if you don’t have a soul mate to share it with, right? Well, fear not, our guide will outline to you how to get a girlfriend in GTA: San Andreas.
Love in GTA is a complicated thing, not least because the main character, CJ, seems to have a pretty odd taste in women. Aside from being a homicidal psychopath with a soft spot, CJ likes girls that are into performing drive-by shootings on rival gang members, robbing banks, police chases, and BDSM. I guess when you define yourself by the fact that you’ve murdered 17,000 people, been in shootouts with tanks, and robbed a casino, your capacity to hold a calm and stable relationship together is probably going to suffer a little.
That being said, if you play your cards right and don’t kill the girl, then you can actually keep a relationship going in GTA: San Andreas for some time. And some of them will even provide you with certain benefits like free customizations on your car – not that you should only consider what you can gain from it, you selfish devil, you.
So, now you’ve got your head around the psychos waiting for your companionship, let’s get into how to find them.
How to find a girlfriend in GTA: San Andreas
First thing’s first, you’ll need to complete the ‘burning desire’ mission. In this mission, you’ll have to throw Molotov cocktails through the windows of a local gang house to burn it to the ground, and then kill the gang members that try to flee the scene – just the usual start to a romance, right?
Thing is, the gang members aren’t the only people in the building – there’s also a woman stuck in the building with them. You’ll have to bust into the burning house, grab a fire extinguisher, and get to work saving the girl from a slow and agonizing death in flames. Once you’ve saved her, Denise – as she introduces herself to you as – will give you a kiss and you’ll get a notification that she is now your girlfriend and you can go on dates with her.
To go on dates with Denise, which include dining out, dancing (which is a fun interactive minigame where you have to score above a certain points threshold) and driving around the neighborhood while she hangs out your window with a sub-machine gun shooting at rival gang members, simply go to her house and if she’s available there will be a market outside her door.
That’s the first one, what about the others?
STORYLINE SPOILER ALERT: Eventually, you’ll get run out of Los Santos by a combination of corrupt police and organized rival gangs (with a little pinch of betrayal thrown in for good measure). At this point, you’re probably not going to see Denise again for a while, which means she’ll break up with you.
But fear not, for there are plenty more fish in the sea. Catolina is one. You’ll meet her in a bar while she fends off some people with a knife (totally not psycho, we promise), she’ll then bring you into her plan to rob a string of businesses across the state (okay, we lied, she’s even more psycho than the first one).
She is probably the most insane person in the entire game and your relationship will eventually be cut short thanks to the storyline of the game, where she eventually runs off with the main character from GTA III. Probably for the best, although, like any good psycho girlfriend, she’ll keep calling you throughout the game to confess her undying love for you, or just to record herself having sex with someone else.
The not-so-psycho one
In San Fierro, you’ll be tasked with getting a driver’s license (appropriate, given the name of the game is pretty heavily linked to driving). At the driving school, go inside, and at some times of day there will be a girl there, you can talk to her and she’ll also give you her number. Now you can go on dates with her, too! Yay, love always finds a way. She owns a car showroom, so you can mod your ride for free. She’s also a little less psycho than the last one, which is good. CJ goes through the motions just like the rest of us, y’know?
The kinky one
This is probably the one you were waiting for, right? This one you find in the “Key to Her Heart” mission, which is fairly late on in the game. The point of the mission is to follow the girl, then beat up the guy she’s meeting to take his place so that you can get to know her and eventually steal a key card from her to assist you in a casino heist. This one is pretty easy to get along with and has a penchant for BDSM.
The gun-toting one
The last one on this list is found while shooting targets in the Ammu-Nation gun store in Blueberry, Red County. She owns a farm and is good at shooting stuff so it’s probably not a good idea to piss her off.
In many ways, GTA: San Andreas could be considered a field guide in how not to meet women in the real world, but seeing as you’re a pixelated blob with no real-world consequences, knock yourselves out and find these most interesting women while you’re playing GTA.
Once you’ve had your fill, we recommend you download Tinder and attempt to meet some real women in this world (assuming you’re over 18 and not following the same lifestyle as CJ…). In the meantime, stick to the games.