Is your boss pissing you off again? Workplace politics getting you down? It’s a well-observed fact that one of the major causes of depression is a feeling of having no control in the workplace. So, before you quit your job and actually start taking control of your own life rather than continuing down a corporate rabbit hole that sickens you and only allows you to buy pointless things that you don’t need, you might want to play Kick the Buddy.
This game has been described as one of the best stress-relievers in gaming history. You start, choose your weapon and then mindlessly attack a ragdoll. It’s a messed up situation, and that poor little guy is getting unethically tortured like some Guantanamo Bay inmate who never actually committed any crime. But man, does it make you feel good? Hell yeah. It’s no wonder the vikings pillaged and burned.
The game is simple as a guy with a double-digit IQ, so you really don’t need much mental input to play it. Anyone who can figure out how to navigate the Google Play Store can get into this sadist puppet game. Whoever said apk app games ain’t classy anymore clearly missed out on this.
To be frank, you know for sure when every website gives it a 5-star review except for one that is solely dedicated to lame-ass conservative parents trying to find non-violent games for their winey and unprepared-for-life kids. Anyone with as much as a spec of personality can no doubt agree that this is a good omen for the Kick the Buddy game.
Yes, concerned parents, note that it’s in fact your incessant over-protection of your kids that causes them to act out and stab other children with pencils, not violent video games.
Reasons Why You Should Download Kick the Buddy APK
Your job sucks. Take all the rage and resentment you have bottled up about the fact that you’ve a) messed your entire life up, or b) young, broke, and not yet in any position to be taken seriously by anyone.
Your school sucks: Same rules as above apply, probably more geared towards the latter.
You’re a bit mental. It’s good to let it out sometimes, buddy. Kick that buddy!
Other drivers suck. This is a common phenomenon. If you feel like the roads would be better off if a sinkhole emerged and engulfed all the other vehicles on the road, then you could probably benefit from this game.
Your team lost. Rather than throwing the remote at the TV, try senselessly torturing a defenceless ragdoll. Obviously, you would think to do that before anything else.
The state of the global financial system doesn’t satisfy or benefit you personally enough. Also known as political opinions. These are likely to cause stress, so manage them more effectively with the Kick the Buddy game.
How to Download Kick the Buddy Game on Android
To get this glorious stress killer on Android, simply press the download button at the top of this page. You’ll be redirected to the Google Play Store where you just have to hit “install.” The game is free to play, although it has some ads and, of course, in app purchases, presumably to buy more torture weapons and make the little buddy’s day even worse than it already was when you unleashed a fire-breathing dragon on him, strapped C4 explosives to his legs and then threw axes at him like some deranged Saxon warlord.
Let’s look at some of the creative ways you can unleash abject horror on Buddy.
Ways to Rain Death Upon Buddy
There are a whole bunch of ways to unleash suffering on Buddy the ragdoll. The first, and most obvious category is firearms, which includes all sorts of guns – take out your road rage with an AK-47 (the classic way). You can also use bio-weapons like hazardous waste, dissolvent, or just good old laughing gas.
You can unleash hounds, dragons, robots and good old “household appliances” – which consists of basically everything weird you could use to hurt something in your free time. In fact, this game is pretty weird. It has to be said that whoever made it must have spent at least six months developing it which itself must have involved hours of wandering around their house picking stuff up and looking at it like “can I kill a ragdoll with this?”
Download the Kick the Buddy game free for Android to unleash all of these weapons and many, many more.
Pure, unfiltered stress relief
You’ll never get road rage again when you can pull over for five minutes to play this game. Take your day out on a harmless teddy bear looking thing and you’ll feel like you’ve just spent half an hour meditating.
Not all good things have to have complexity. This is a perfect example of where going simple can get you straight to the point. The point, in this case, being fun!
Again, nothing over the top, just simple and good looking enough to make playing the game satisfying. The sounds of the weapons are also very much on point.
This game really is more like medication for the mentally deranged than it is a casual bit of entertainment. Playing this game is like being Joe Pesci for a day. Any time you’re about to burst a vein in your neck, simply gear up and unload a magazine of 5.56mm bullets into a toy. Problem solved.
Ultimately, the whole concept of Kick the Buddy is just ridiculous to the point where it’s really quite funny. Of course, a certain standard of humour is required to get in on the laughs, otherwise you’ll just be outraged at the whole thing. Best taken with a pinch of salt, concerned parent.
If you’re looking for a game that will allow you to keep your inner maniac in check by giving it frequent light doses of torturous mayhem, then download Kick the Buddy game apk free now by pressing the button at the top of this page. Play it and let the stress disappear.